#thoughts · thoughts · Uncategorized · Vents

Comparing won’t fix them

Hey guys.

So I was talking to my best friend (Lainey) on the phone the other night, and she honestly wasn’t coping with anything. She was sick, she was tired,she was worried, she missed her family (She goes to a boarding school) and she was basically having a meltdown from all the drama that had been going around at her school. It was pretty late, so both of us were struggling to think properly (I swear, my brain was actually sleeping), but something that she had said got me thinking. I had been trying to help her to feel better, but all of a sudden she said ‘Skye. I shouldn’t be upset! I’m so, so blessed. And a million other people have it worse than me.’ While this is true in some aspects, and while I know that personally I tend to think like this a lot as well, there were parts to that statement that I realized I had never quite thought about before.

Saying that you can’t be sad because someone else has it worse is actually like saying that you can’t be happy because someone else has it better. 

Now how silly (not trying to be offensive in any way) does that sound? Absolutely no one can say that you can’t be sad while others are.

I mean, yes it is true that there will alwaaaaays (underline the word always) going to be someone out there that you can compare yourself with. Whether that be in a positive or negative way. But the person that you’re comparing yourself with is battling their own problems and demons. No one has the exactly same situation as you do. Everyone is unique from one another, and we all have different strengths and weaknesses. We all have our own emotions, and we all deal with them in our own personal ways. Comparing emotions doesn’t fix them.

If we all spent our time trying to stop feeling sad by comparing ourselves, those negative and upsetting emotions would never properly go away. Instead, they would only be covered in someone else’s problems. And that certainly doesn’t  fix yours, does it? No. You need to be able to feel them in able to properly get rid of them. You need to sometimes be sad to be properly happy later.

I Honestly think that’s something that most of us need to realise. Especially meeeee hahaha.

I do hope all you guys are happy though. And even if you’re not at the moment, I hope you know that you will be happy again soon.

God bless you.

Skyee xx.

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16 thoughts on “Comparing won’t fix them

  1. I think that more people need to understand the message behind your post. We all deal with our own problems, but comparing it with other people’s issues does not help at all. I also think this message applies to those who shake off some people’s struggles because there’s always someone who has it worse; like, yes, there are children in third-world countries who are dying, but that doesn’t mean that we don’t have the right to be sad. Great post, I enjoyed reading it!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Amen, preach it. Thanks so much for all support, Bella. It means a lot 🙂 xx Also this is kind of off topic…But when I was younger and I didn’t like eating my peas, my older brother would always say ‘what about the starving children in Africa!? They don’t get any peas!’ And I remember always hating it how he compared me with them hahaha. I’m thankful for them now though XD

      Liked by 1 person

  2. My point exactly!
    I stopped posting on FB because I realized that people (who are my friends) undermine the things I go through (w/o even asking what I go through actually) by saying, “pray” or “people had it worse” “africa’s got it worse” my gosh, u didnt even care to pm me what I am depressing myself about…

    I have a friend who’s like forever troubled, I can nvr be the other friend who is in trouble bcz she’s got it really bad and me sharing will be like colds vs cancer. I always had to keep it to myself.

    We all have problems and we have ways to deal with it and we are all created differently. Some are born to stand against the worse avalanche in the Himalayas and some, can’t even stand against soda. I mean, it may not be big for you but it meant the world to me… So I should have my chance to be sad and wallow on my sadness until its over… Believe me, this issue doesnt get resolved by age. I have aged and people’s reactions are still the same.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. First of all, thank you soooo much for taking the time to write that. It meant a lot to see you connecting with my post 🙂 xx
      Okay and second of all, oh how you should have your chance to feel sad. It’s honestly not fair when friends do that (I know they don’t always mean to). Like I feel like saying to them ‘you have your go at building your strength and character through this battle, can I have mine without feeling guilty? Please?’

      Thanks again for your support, it means so much 🙂 xx

      Liked by 1 person

      1. 😀 and it’s true what you said in the last part of your post, “And even if you’re not at the moment, I hope you know that you will be happy again soon.”

        — because this is what God’s promised in Romans 8:18 “I consider our present sufferings insignificant compared to the glory that will soon be revealed to us”

        but yeah, we were not prohibited to wallow on those insignificance 😀 we’re humans! we feel things…

        Like

  3. I need this to be my motto in life. I am constantly considering my emotions to be nonsense, like I shouldn’t be worrying about a friend fallout because there are people dying in the world. This helps so much 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I’ve never thought about it in that way, but yeah, we might have it better than some, but that doesn’t mean that we can’t be angry and upset because we have it better. At the end of the day, we all have feelings and emotions that take toll on our life sometimes, and we can’t compare to make us feel better..

    Like

  5. Because of the life we live and how we are brought up , things affect us more than anything. Even the tiniest things. Maybe, living in war or poverty is something normal and how they are brought up and doesn’t hurt as much as overcoming our difficulties. Obviously, I’m not saying war is okay or easy or anything of the sort, but things out of our comfort zone are hard to deal with. Comparing with others is wrong and dumb because situations are so different and our lives are so different. This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t care about people out there in the harsh, harsh world or shrug it off, no. Just don’t compare. Great post!

    Like

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